ASSERTIVENESS FOR TODAY’s SENSITIVE EMPATHIC WOMAN
Dear amazing, beautiful ones,
Thank you for being here with me in this Spiral Path Community and on this journey of conscious living. As always, when something happens in my life that impacts me powerfully and really grabs my attention, I think about you and how I could share something meaningful from that experience to support you in your life, on your path.
This sharing is one of those…it has to do with claiming permission to be more powerful and assertive in our lives as sensitive, empath women.
The importance of this issue of power and assertiveness was driven home to me yesterday in of all things, a yoga class.
This is a chair yoga class that basically uses a chair and blocks, straps, cushions, etc as props and it’s fantastic! It’s wonderful for anyone who has any kind of physical limitation, and I am in that category right now with a tender back and sort of wonky knee.
So, I’m happily being present in my body and following along with the practice, led by my wonderful teacher.
I’m turned to the left in my chair with my right knee on two bolsters which are on the floor, because I need them there for right positioning. A woman I’ve never seen in class before is seated to my left. Suddenly unbeknownst to me, she steps out of her chair, and without saying a word, she comes up behind me, grabs my leg and twists it into what she thinks is the right position.
WTF??? I mean What the actual FUCK???
I immediately say, ‘WHAT are you doing??” and tell her to let go of me.
I stand up and I walk out of the class. I am furious!
I talk to the manager of the studio…where by the way, I have always felt safe and respected… and explain to her what had happened. She can see how upset I am.
The young woman who grabbed my leg comes out and is all kinds of defensive… “Well, I’m a chair yoga instructor, I was just helping you…etc”
And I say, “I don’t care who you are, what your training is, and what you thought you were doing. You don’t know me you, don’t know my limitations, you don’t know my body, and you do not have permission to touch me.” There was more to it than this, but you get the gist.
So long story short, I take whatever happens to me, especially when it’s that dramatic, as a message from the Universe and so I pondered…
Frankly, I don’t need any inspiration or support to assert myself. I’m well trained, well versed, at this point in life, I am naturally assertive. I have healed a lot of the old, obsolete empath people-pleasing patterns. And I have taught assertiveness to sensitive empath women for decades.
But I know that many of the women I work with as clients and students still need the affirmation, permission, and encouragement to stand up for themselves. My intention is to help them get to the point where they don’t even take a beat before clearly defining their boundaries and limits with other people.
What came to my mind after that experience, was that I know there were women in that class who might have let her do what she was doing, and not made her stop.
She could have seriously damaged my knee… and… she did not have permission to touch me.
So I’m writing this as a way of reminding, emphasizing and affirming that you are a sovereign being, you own your physical space.
You have every right to define your physical space, to define who gets to touch you, and to set limits and boundaries with anyone who comes into your space. I can’t state this strongly enough.
And if this is a tricky issue for you, it simply because as young empaths we were not trained how to manage our energy, and were not taught that we had the right to be who we are, and to assertively take care of ourselves.
We were taught to yield to authority and then we extrapolated that out to include A LOT of people we felt we needed to yield to.
One of the reasons I started a Facebook group called, “The ART of MIRACLES for Today’s Sensitive Empath Women” is that we’re not only looking to manifest those outward Miracles of the stuff that we want to experience in life. We’re also looking for the Miracles of the inner shifts, the deeper transformation that allows us to be more of who we are, and to live more comfortably, and more confidently.
And those are the kinds of changes that lead us to manifesting Miracles in our lives.
I hope sharing this helps.
And keep your eye on this blog….
I will be announcing an Assertiveness for Sensitive Empathic Woman coaching group soon.
I love you….
And as always, I hope you SPARKLE!!
Janice Masters, M.Ed., The Shaman Mama
Counselor, Coach, Consultant, Mentor for Sensitive Empath Women who are ready to find more Self Love and THRIVE.
**TEN DAYS LEFT on my SUMMER SPECIAL OFFER for packages of 60 minute Private Sessions with me. 25%+ Discount.
Offer good through August 31, 2019. Contact me for details.
theshamanmama at gmail dot com
©Janice Masters 2019